Episode 49: Living With Misophonia In A Noisy World With Jeffrey S. Gould of Quiet Please
So technically I’m supposed to be on “hiatus” from the podcast while I finish my book. But I just couldn’t stay away from you. Especially when I’ve just recorded an interview on a topic that so many of you have said you wanted to know more about.
When I first talked about misophonia (the hatred of sound) on Episode 30 with Ashlae Warner, I got tons of messages from listeners saying they felt such relief knowing they weren’t alone in either experiencing misophonia themselves or having to deal with someone who had it. So when I saw there was a new documentary about it, I knew I had to get the filmmaker (Jeffrey S. Gould) on the pod to give us the full scoop on this condition…and share everything he learned while making the film.
Jeffrey and I discuss what misophonia is and isn’t; how sufferers deal with the anger, sadness, and guilt that comes with the condition; how his own sensitivities to sound led him to create his new film, Quiet Please; his tips on creating coping mechanisms; and why he says the grocery store can turn him into Charles Manson.
Here’s Jeffrey:
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SHOW NOTES:
Quiet Please’s Website + FB + Twitter
Watch the trailer
Support the film
Blackberry, Vanilla + Lime Smoothie via The First Mess
Misophonia resources and articles:
What Misophonia Feels Like (video)
Please Stop Making That Noise via NYT
Buzzfeed’s Misophonia Memes and then An Actual Neurological Study
Misophonia Self Test
Misophonia International
Misophonia Support Group
You don’t have to bite that potato chip like it’s the last thing you’re ever going to eat. - Jeffrey Gould on… Click To Tweet
We all can’t be 100% mindful, 100% of the time. - Jeffrey Gould of Quiet Please Click To Tweet
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23 Comments
planetMitch
February 8, 2016By the way, there are plenty of people Jeff (like me and my daughter) who pronounce it “MissOphonia” – it was even debated at the Miso Conference this past year. So there. HaHa
Very nice podcast! Jeff rocks.
Jessica
February 9, 2016Thanks so much for listening to the episode! Meeeeeesoophonia vs Misssophonia – the debate continues!
Jeffrey
February 10, 2016Hey Mitch, thanks for listening, I think you pronounce it based on how you heard it the first time…since that’s your only reference. You do know that Christa says MYSO right? 🙂 “They” should’ve spelled it with two s’ if they wanted it said that way. Thank you sir…
Sara
February 8, 2016Interesting podcast. I’ve definitely got a touch of misophonia. Apparently, I wasn’t alone in being driven crazy by the “woo guy” during last night’s super bowl.
http://news.yahoo.com/real-loser-super-bowl-50-134031173.html
Jessica
February 9, 2016Sara, OMG. Luckily, I wasn’t paying that close attention to the game (as in, I was too busy eating guacamole) to notice. I’m so glad I didn’t hear this. Thanks for sharing this! And welcome to the Misophonia club.
Julie
February 8, 2016Jess, (I can call you Jess, right? When I tell people about something I heard on your podcast, I’m like “so my friend Jess told me…” Anyway, I digress.) Have you taken the quiz to see if you are a Highly Sensitive Person? http://hsperson.com/. I was so excited to learn about this, like “it’s not just me that’s a freak.”
Jessica
February 9, 2016You can definitely call me Jess. And now I can say, “so my friend Julie, told me about a Highly Sensitive Person test. I took it and I am DEF an HSP”. Thanks so much for sharing this! We can be little freaks together.
krystal
February 9, 2016I am insanely excited about this movie. I’m also going to have my husband listen to this episode. He knows there are certain sounds that bother me but I don’t think he fully gets HOW MUCH. This is so validating. I was nodding along to all of this.
I also love what Jeff said about chips. I laughed because I say that all. the. time. Your food isn’t going to run away, so just chill out! Happy to have a new episode and I’m looking forward to the micro podcast on Friday!
Jeffrey
February 10, 2016Thanks Krystal, Many people have written me when the trailer came out and thanked me for giving them something to show their spouse, family or friends; I think it helps, but they’ll always be doubters that think we’re out to control the world and not realize that the reaction to certain sounds is beyond our control. I eat so slowly that everyone else is on dessert while I still have the main course in front of me. Jeff
Mariela
February 11, 2016Slurping, popcorn munching, chewing with mouth open in general…. THE WORSE! I disagree about the first pour of wine, though! To me it is a delightful sound and usually means the best part of the day is about to start. Loved the interview. 😉
Jeffrey
February 12, 2016Hi Mariela, thanks for listening; and that’s the reason why it’s impossible to make a “trigger free” film…one person’s noxious sound is another’s retreat. They say that triggers can be contagious, but that hasn’t happened to as of yet. I agree with all of your sounds that you listed…. Jeff
Pam
February 12, 2016Great job! Love the honesty and humor. Thanks for the great recipe too!
Jessica
February 25, 2016Thanks for listening, Pam!
Bonnie
February 13, 2016Excellent interview! I can’t wait for the film to come out. Thanks for sharing your stories.
Jessica
February 25, 2016Thanks, Bonnie! I can’t wait for the movie too.
Jackie
February 24, 2016This is a great interview, Jessica, at least the part I heard. I love your enthusiasm.
I am intrigued by the subject matter of this particular podcast, but the guest almost always made that annoying mouth smacking sound at the beginning of every sentence. You’d think someone with misophonia would be aware of this and bend over backward to avoid doing it. I’m also surprised the host wasn’t distracted by it. If I was conducting the interview, I’d be so torn — just as I am now as a listener — between my interest in the conversation and my extreme focus on that ANNOYING MOUTH NOISE. Perhaps there are different levels of this hell.
I’m sad that I’m missing out on most of the program. 🙁 When someone finds a cure, I’ll return and listen to the rest of the show! 🙂
Good luck with the movie!
Jessica
February 25, 2016Jackie, sorry you felt that way. I guess I just loved our conversation so much that I didn’t notice it. Definitely check out his movie when it comes out. Jeffrey is a REALLY great person!
Kilie
March 25, 2017My misophonia was triggered to the extreme in the beginning of your podcast. It sounds as if a truck pulls up and sits idly for a little bit then takes off. I had to stop listening and when I pulled it back together, the sounds of the vehicle driving off was so relieving.
My miso is bad. This podcast was great, especially the small portion on the visual part, but I still feel like I have yet to find someone as severe as myself 🙁 Props to you though, this was inspiring and helped me not feel so alone.
Jessica
March 26, 2017So sorry that you are dealing with bad miso. You are def not alone! Hope you are able to watch Jeff’s film and feel even less alone.
Lindsay
April 5, 2017My apologies. I wish I could have listened to this. Much like any pod casts I’ve tried to listen to seriously erks the *bleep* out of me. High quality audio and a mouth hugging the mic is what sets me off. The beginning portion with the “music” was fine. But when I can hear breathing, tongue clacking, swallowing, or any saliva squishing, I feel like hitting things 🙁 I work all day at a PC and my only options are music and low quality audio from youtube. Again I’m sorry. Wish that cast was transcribed into words. =\
Jessica
April 9, 2017Sorry that you had this experience. Hopefully you can find some podcasts that work for you.
Tracey V
July 30, 2018I search and search for Miso articles and things to listen to, just so I can feel slightly better, and know that it isn’t JUST ME. It’s a struggle, one most people laugh at, because they really just don’t understand. I am so curious to know what others do at work. I’m an Executive Assistant and sit in a very open place, it’s is PAINFUL daily to sit where I sit. People walk by on their phones, clicking pens, jingling change, whistling, ugh the whistling. My boss actually thinks it is funny to crunch on things and click his pen, meanwhile I want to poke his eyes out with said pen. I’m also so curious if ANYTHING has worked for anyone. I thought of hypnosis, but the guy I went to, asked me to listen to some tapes and his chair was squeaky, so I couldn’t listen. I’m wondering if cognitive therapy has worked for anyone. Thank you for this podcast. I, too, am going to watch the film and have my family members do the same. I know that those without this disorder never will fully get it, but I’m hoping this will help a little. THANK YOU!!!!
Jessica
August 8, 2018You aren’t alone, Tracey! I remember the times I’ve worked in cubicles and had to have headphones on the entire time. And getting on airplanes…AHHH! When the snacks come out, I lose my shit.
Unfortunately, I haven’t heard of any therapy that has worked. I think it’s about doing your best with the situation. Removing yourself when you can or politely asking people to stop their behavior. It’s hard out there on the pen clicking streets! For real. Hang in there and hope you enjoy the film. Here’s to quiet lunches!